i think its been way too many times that I've been upset to even count. and i'm honestly getting sick of it. i can't breathe anymore. maybe this was what i wanted. all choked up again. i feel so influence by the world sometimes, to conform into what they ought to be. things like, having super action packed plans for Christmas, the New Year or to, have a boyfriend and live in a non existing fairy tale called reality. i'm so sick of all these ideas but i can't help it myself to leave them alone or even to get away from them. i suck. as simple as that. i'm not mature enough to leave them alone.
&, ironically i'm aware of that.
i really do wonder though, if good things do come to those who wait?
