all in good time

before i start on my reflective journal (rj) and quiz, i'd like to blog. my weekend was pretty insane, went zouk/phuture with Charmaine/'s cousins/Azlan/Adrian/Dejing/Hazel/Daphne/Izzul, met x at night, spent time, got locked out of house for coming home at 3am, cried the fuck when mom locked me out for an hour. had no guts to call the police. stoned at void deck alone, banged the gates and cried again. i feel fucking stupid; come to think about it. sigh whatever. i want to change. move on. but i'm still pretty in love with whats happening around me now, i'm just not ready to move on. i can't get my fucking study engine running, its already the week 4 of school, and honestly i'm barely coping and adjusting to the changes, the new school regulations and the change of classes everyday. my daily routine pretty much have been > lesson starts > smoke break/breakfast > lessons > smoke > lunch/skip > lessons > chill/smoke/home. yep that's pretty much it. god i need a life. i've been trying to pick up my guitar and start strumming again, going to master snow petrol's chasing car before i move on to other songs like forget you by cee lo green and maybe teenage dream? price tag? never gonna leave this bed? heh can't wait for my finger to start bleeding. xo